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"WE" vs. "ME"

2004-10-09 & 9:28 p.m.


Who knew that this is what my life would lead to. I am sitting here thinking about what has occured in the last year...no wait...the last fucking 4 months. Like what the hell?

I am sitting here in my own bedroom alone on a Saturday night watching Trading Spaces and eating soup. Oh yeah and I am a lesbian who is getting a divorce.

Fairly soon, I will be moving out. I will be having to give up a few of my dogs. I will be living on my own and trying to make it on my own with my own income.

Does this freak me out?

No. And I think that is the problem. I should be freaked out. I should be panicked. I should be afraid of the change. Instead, I embrace it. I am looking forward to it. I am looking forward to the excitement of my new relationship, the independence of living on my own, and just getting to be myself. I am not part of this "WE" of a marriage.
Yes, I am in a relationship with someone and we are a we but we are not a "WE" wherein we share credit history, debt, animals, furniture, dishes, appliances and et cetera. I mean one day I would like to be a "WE" with her but for now, I want to be "ME" who is merely a part of "us".


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<<<< relive my past & step into the future >>>>

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