All Of My Days Have Been Misspent
I really don't know why I felt I needed to adopt the three most neurotic dogs on the planet. They were all rejects from the Dog Factory. I pulled them out of the reject pile and hoped that I could rehabilitae them to become functioning members of society. I was wrong. Terribly, horribly and desperately wrong. Right now if you look out the patio door you will see 3 pathetic whining creatures who will not even perform their bodily functions unless I am standing out there watching them. They cannot stand that a paine of glass is seperating them from me. This causes them great despair and causes them to make noises I have never heard from any other animals before. They also continually lick the glass as though licking it will somehow make the door magically open. To paraphrase Betty Butterfield, "I know I have disrespected my dogs, but lord them peoples crazier than I am. I can't deal with them alzeheimers mentally disabled."
I wanna go see Mean Girls. Sarah, will you go with me? Because if you don't, I will totally not like you. Well okay I will pretend to like you to your face but then behind your back I will tell everyone about what you did at that farm in Tijuana over Spring Break.
