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Rob Schneider as �The Piece of Shit�.

2004-05-05 & 11:21 p.m.


The Husband: �Why do the animals have to ruin everything?�

Me: �Because they are preparing us for when our children ruin everything.�

Okay so when I saw that interview with Drew Barrymore and she was saying that she made the Charlie�s Angels movies to show women that they could be strong and there could be women action movie heroes she was full of bullshit, which is par for the course for Drew Barrymore anyways. When I see Cameron Diaz riding a mechanical bull with her short little skirt on I see that we are not trying to show the strength of women, we are trying to get the men to be turned on. I say this as I sit next to a drooling husband who can do nothing but stare at the special effects and Drew Barrymore�s tits. I am sure that they are both equally erotic for him.

TH: �This has to take the Oscar for most nonbelievable action sequence ever� (Said after watching �The Angels� falling off a cliff in a military truck with a chopper on it and then latching onto the chopper while it is falling and getting inside it and flying it.)

I just looked the wall and noticed a Christmas decoration that I forgot to take down. Whoopsy daisy�.! Speaking of whoopsy daisy and the like, a guy I play volleyball with (I call him Left Handed Mark because there are 3 Marks: Left Handed Mark, Original Mark and Old School Mark) Anyways, LH Mark said, �Oh hells bells� and I was all, �Hells Bells?? Who says that? In the middle of a volleyball game?� especially when I can be found yelling Fuck and Shit really loudly very OFTEN.

Me: Rydell High School�? How retarded?

TH: So?

Me: I can�t believe that you don�t know the significance of Rydell��

TH: No I don�t.

Me: I cannot believe I am married to you�.

TH: What is Rydell?

Me: The high school in Grease�.

TH: I hate Grease. I have never made it through Grease�..

Me: I cannot be married to you�..

TH: Okay, BYE!!!!!!!

Okay Charlie�s Angels Full Throttle is annoying me on so many levels right now. First of all, there is the whole Bernie Mac as Bosely thing. Was there something wrong with Bill Murray? Oh yeah�he was busy shooting a GOOD MOVIE. (Lost in Translation) And it is just a dumb movie. Put it into the category of shitty movies that didn�t need shitty sequels but we made them anyways. But that�s what Hollywood lives for. Ooooh a glimmer of hope, I saw a picture of Chris Pontius�..maybe he is in it�.that would make it all better, especially if he dresses up in the Party Boy thong and starts doing some dancing�..although I doubt it.

Alrighty folks, I am going to keep watching this piece of shit called a film��you know what�that is what I am going to do�I am going to make a film about a piece of shit. It is bound to be better than any Rob Schneider movie. Better yet, that is the movie I am going to make, Rob Schneider as �The Piece of Shit�.


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<<<< relive my past & step into the future >>>>

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