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Gourmet Meals and Procreation

2003-11-21 & 1:16 p.m.


Fez on his English teacher: She's always writing sexy comments on my homework. "Nice job." "Good effort." "See me."

-That's 70's Show

DING DONG Romano's dead...too bad noone knows it yet. And oh the irony..to lose an arm by chopper blade only to a year later get killed by a chopper... I am speaking of ER of course. I hardly thought it was the "biggest event" in ER history however. Eh! DAMN YOU SWEEPS!

My Siamese whore of a cat broke one of my favorite vases today. And it woke me up...and I got a peice of glass in my foot. Because of course it was in the bathroom and where do we all walk barefoot...in the bathroom. Damn Siamese whore!

Neo will probably get to come home today on a restricted diet and with mom carefully neurotically monitoring his every body function. Particularly urination.

I think I may spring for a gourmet Mexican feast this evening courtesy of Le Bell. When we eat out we eat out....

Why do people on television and in movies always go into labor at the worst time....? And why does it happen instantaneously? My mom was in labor for like 36 hours...yeah I have been a pain in the ass since the beginning.

I am scared of another life spewing forth from my loins...I also do not want to be in labor for some insane amount of time and not be able to eat and drink. And I am told horror of horrors that you sometimes shit yourself whilst you are in labor. OH MY GOD! I cannot do that.... Anyways it is probably good that I do not have children right now because the main reasons I would consider having children right now would be:

1) So I can drive in the carpool lane.

2) So I can get a Kate Spade diaper bag

3) If I had a baby I would have good reasons to shop at Babies R Us other than buying a baby gate to keep the heathens out of the bedroom or buying a playpen for Pooh to sleep in while we are gone.

4) So I would actually have another human to talk to during the day...I would not care if it was baby talk.

5)TWO WORDS: Baby Shower (I love when people throw parties and give me things for free)

Eh..maybe I should shower now and go pick up the Neo....


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